I wouldn't sail this ship if I were you
Friday categorization #20
5549 Holidays
-5549.1 Those spent in the sunshine
–5549.11 Sunshine that is a glorious surprise, such as in Scotland in April
–-5549.111 In which those from cold countries are seized with a kind of weather delirium at the start of the day, and laid up with sunburn or heat exhaustion at the end
–5549.12 Sunshine that seemed like a good idea at the time, but is actually a little relentless when it comes down to it
-5549.13 Haphazard resorts filled with feral cats, sneaking ham at breakfast and pissing on lilos
-5549.14 Those resorts that are half performance and half holiday, and who would be after a feral cat in souped-up golf buggies the moment it dared set foot on the polished boulevards
–5549.15 Those in which there are beaches of purple shells, or meadows of rusting guns, or one has to park in a bay full of peacocks, or some other such incidents that one can recall in dull hours
–5549.16 Those in which one discovers the awful ubiquity of sand
-5549.2 Those spent in the rain
–5549.21 Rain that is like a lullaby on the roof at night and a gentle, grey and welcome mist in the morning over the distant hills
–5549.22 Rain at the seaside in the Springtime, as viewed from a forlorn arcade beside a wet pebble beach
–5549.23 In which one is a grizzled explorer with a thermos of hot chocolate and a soggy map
–5549.24 In which one writes a love letter to a city and the city closes its eyes, farts and goes to sleep
-5549.3 Those that rely on snow
–5549.31 Those that do not get snow, and have to make do with marshmallows
-5549.4 Those that happen at home
–5549.41 Those that were not intended to happen at home, but necessitated by chicken pox or travel disruption or last-minute breakups or the accidental failure to exist of the intended destination
–5549.42 Those intended for the production of some Great Work
–-5549.421 That are subject to a creative block so intense that one ends up back at work as a form of procrastination
-5549.5 Those that don’t happen
–5549.51 Micro-breaks, like micro-sleeps, in which one closes ones eyes and moves a little bit to the side to simulate the experience of travelling a millionth of the way to Bermuda
–5549.52 Those holidays that are spent in a hotel room, shitting
–5549.53 Those holidays spent on the phone to the office
