Listing to Port

The Undergardener, the Nine Generals of the Owl Battalions, my Lord High Tweaker of Noses, the Knight of the Night of the Deep Ocean, the Knight of the Proof, the Guardian of the Number Three Bus, the Auditor of Dreams Lost, Madame Igniter, the Hat-Enchanter of the Privy Chamber, the Keeper of the Fairy Fruit, the Lord High Befuddler-in Chief, my Lady Shuts-Doors, the Burrower-of-Hollows, the Chief Whisperer, the Baronet of Solace to Joyful Souls, the Knight of Withered-Cities, the Keeper of the Red Bell, the Hope-Winder First Class, the Shepherd of Purples, the Mouth of the Moon-Emperors

1. A comprehensive atlas of the Territories to the North, newly annotated with suggested trade routes and cultural footnotes, for the benefit and education of interested travellers.
2. A moderately comprehensive atlas of the Territories to the North-East, including annotated outbound routes by ship, return routes on foot, and places to avoid leaving your ship.
3. When and how I ate my shoes: true tales from the godforsaken, desolate Northlands.
4. The art and practice of slow cooking: how to work miracles on the toughest of meats.
5. Never be bored again: more activities than you could even need to fill those dreary hours waiting for things to finish.
6. When inspiration fails: what to do when you have run out of stuff to do.
7. The day the lambs withdrew their shanks: a true history of the rise of the Faster Fast Food Movement and the Great Stew Revolt.
8. In defence of going very fast.
9. A vision for a fairer and more equitable legal system.
10. A comprehensive atlas of the territories to the North: their nooks, crannies and hiding places.